


remember me

by sxftmelody



Series: prompt requests [3]
Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 12:50:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16475894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sxftmelody/pseuds/sxftmelody
Summary: Anon asked: you're good with angst so can you write something like jungeun having an accident that makes her not remember jinsoul or the years she's been dating her at all so jinsoul has to remind her everything they did and used to do and all the plans they had for the future etc? it's okay if you don't want to





	remember me

“She might not be the same person that you know and love,” the doctor explains to the blonde woman who’s clutching the limp hand of her lover, “and when she wakes up, she might not remember you.”

 

Jinsol focuses on the steady beep of the heart monitor, trying to calm her own heart as she stares at the bandages wrapped around Jungeun’s head.

 

“Is…” Jinsol starts off, having to stop and clear her throat because speaking through her tears has always been hard for her.

 

The doctor is patient, though, and stays silent as Jinsol tries to gather her racing thoughts.

 

“Is it possible at all for her to regain her memory?”

 

The doctor gives a sorry smile, “I’m sorry, Miss Jung. Nothing’s set in stone, at least not until she wakes up and we can evaluate her condition. It’s possible, yes—there are cases where people have been able to remember their past and only struggle with remembering new information—but Jungeun’s received a pretty traumatic hit to her hippocampus. That’s the part of the brain that—”

 

“—is responsible for memory,” Jinsol finishes for the doctor.

 

Jinsol helped Jungeun study for her Psychology test _years_ ago, when they were still high schoolers.

 

But now Jinsol’s done with college and Jungeun… Jungeun’s in a hospital bed.

 

The doctor gives a slight nod, “Right.”

 

Something inside of the doctor’s pocket beeps, and Jinsol tears her eyes away from her girlfriend.

 

“I’m being called to another patient,” the doctor states with apologetic eyes.

 

Jinsol attempts to smile, nodding, “That’s alright. I’ll just be… here.”

 

“I’ll send a nurse to check in later,” the doctor says, already heading to the door.

 

And then Jinsol’s alone.

 

The only noise in the room aside from the heartbeat monitor is Jinsol sniffling. She holds Jungeun’s hand in both of her own, pressing a lips to Jungeun’s palm.

 

“It’s okay if you don’t remember me,” she whispers, words barely managing to get past her lips, “we can start from the beginning. Don’t worry… don’t worry. We got this. We’ll be fine.”

 

Jinsol ignores the fact that she’s just reassuring herself, because she wants to believe that Jungeun can hear her.

 

-

 

Jungeun wakes up the next day.

 

Jinsol scrambles to press the button next to the hospital bed, calling for the doctor.

 

A groan leaves the injured girl, her eyes opening before closing tightly at the bright lights. Jinsol feels the hand she’s holding pull away. Jungeun tries to put her hand up to her head, but Jinsol’s quick to stop her.

 

“Don’t touch it,” she says, throat hoarse from crying all night, “you’re all bandaged up.”

 

At the voice, Jungeun makes an attempt to open her eyes.

 

She blinks, clearly confused, as she stares at the blonde girl next to her.

 

“Who are—”

 

“Ah, you’re awake,” the doctor says upon opening the door.

 

She closes it behind her, “Can you tell me your full name?”

 

“Kim Jungeun,”

 

“And do you know where you are, Miss Kim?”

 

“Uhhh,” Jungeun stammers, “a hospital?”

 

The doctor hums, taking the clipboard next to the hospital bed and flipping through some papers, “Do you know why?”

 

“An accident,” Jungeun answers before gesturing towards her leg with the hand that isn’t in Jinsol’s grasp, “I mean— _I have a broken leg_.”

 

The doctor lets out a gentle laugh and nods, “Yes, you were in a car accident four days ago. You were sent to the emergency room. You almost didn’t make it.”

 

“But I did,” Jungeun mumbles. She feels Jinsol’s hand tighten, finds it odd that a stranger is holding her hand, but doesn’t pull away because at least the blonde’s hands are soft and warm.

 

“That you did,” the doctor nods again, “you’ve been in a coma, with no telling how long you would be in it.”

 

“Oh,” Jungeun says, head starting to hurt, “wait—did I…”

 

The doctor waits.

 

Then, Jungeun turns to Jinsol, “You’re someone important to me, aren’t you?”

 

Jinsol nods. She can feel pieces of her heart start to chip away.

 

“I’m your girlfriend,”

 

_Did all those years really go down the drain?_

 

Jungeun doesn’t reply.

 

Thankfully, the doctor’s there to keep the atmosphere from plummeting.

 

“Now that Jungeun’s awake, I need to do some tests,” she says, more to Jinsol.

 

Jinsol nods sadly, “Yeah, sure,” she hums, “I… I have to go call Jungeun’s parents anyway, so…”

 

She lets go of Jungeun’s hands, hurrying out the door before the sob can escape her lips.

 

-

 

Jungeun remembers Jiwoo.

 

They’d been childhood friends, and Jungeun (unfortunately) just can’t remember anything that happened the past six years—which happened to be the entirety of her relationship with Jinsol.

 

Jinsol can _see_ the relief come across Jungeun’s features when Jiwoo walks through the door.

 

“Thank God you’re alright,” Jiwoo cries as she carefully hugs Jungeun.

 

Jinsol, who’s seated on a chair next to Jungeun’s bed, bites on her lower lip in quiet envy.

 

Oh, how much she’d give to be able to hug Jungeun like that…

 

“When did the doctors say you’re being released?” Jiwoo asks as she moves away, wiping at the tears on her cheeks.

 

“Tomorrow,” Jungeun answers, “Jinsol told me that she overheard the doctors say I’m recovering quickly.”

 

“Ah,” Jiwoo says, eyes flickering over to Jinsol, “and.. you two…”

 

The question doesn’t need to be asked.

 

_Does she remember you?_

 

Jinsol shakes her head.

 

“Ah,” Jiwoo repeats, quietly—sadly.

 

Conversation goes silent, but then Jiwoo speaks up again, changing the topic, “You have a pet dog.”

 

Jungeun looks at her like she’s grown three heads, “I have a pet _what_?”

 

“A pet dog,” Jiwoo repeats, smiling because she knows that she’s managed to lighten the mood.

 

“I hate dogs,” Jungeun says.

 

Jiwoo nods towards Jinsol, “Jinsol managed to get you to love them.”

 

Jinsol’s thankful that Jiwoo includes her in the conversation. She grins, though not as bright as her usual grins are, “You still hate dogs, actually—you just love Milo.”

 

“Milo?” Jungeun asks in exasperation, “We named it _Milo_?”

 

“He’s cute,” Jiwoo laughs.

 

“No dog named _Milo_ is cute,” Jungeun grumbles.

 

“ _Our_ Milo is,” Jinsol replies, “he always sits on your lap when you’re trying to study.”

 

“Wait, what? He’s a lap dog?”

 

“Nope. He’s a pitbull.”

 

“He’s a _what?_ ”

 

-

 

“I put Milo in his cage because I didn’t want him to overwhelm you,” Jinsol says as she wheels Jungeun down the hallway of their apartment building, “he probably would’ve tried to jump on you if I didn’t.”

 

“Oh God,” Jungeun mumbles, feeling uneasy, “he might break my leg even more.”

 

“He’s a good boy,” Jinsol says in defense of the pitbull, “he listens to you more than he listens to me, though.”

 

“Why’s that?” Jungeun asks as Jinsol presses the button to call for the elevator.

 

Jinsol shrugs, “You were always home more than I was. I have classes and work, and you’re able to work from home most days.”

 

“Ah,” Jungeun nods, more questions coming up.

 

Jinsol smiles, “I called your job when the accident happened. They were understanding and allowed you medical leave. Oh, you work as a writer/editor at a fashion magazine.”

 

“Oh,” Jungeun mumbles, “thanks.”

 

“Yeah, no problem,” Jinsol hums, “don’t be afraid to ask me questions, Jungeun—I’m your…”

 

She trails off, unsure what to say.

 

_Is she still Jungeun’s girlfriend?_

 

The elevator dings and the doors slide open.

 

Jinsol wheels Jungeun inside and presses the button for their floor. The third one.

 

“Pre-accident girlfriend?” Jungeun offers up quietly.

 

Although it hurts, Jinsol nods, “Yeah… I’m your pre-accident girlfriend.”

 

…

 

“Hey, Jinsol?” Jungeun calls out.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“How long have we been together?”

 

“It was going to be six years,”

 

“Going to be?”

 

A hum.

 

“Our sixth year anniversary was the day you got into the accident.”

 

....

 

Jungeun lets out a shaky exhale.

 

Jinsol holds her breath.

 

“ _Oh_.”

 

Jungeun doesn’t ask another question.

 

-

 

“Milo, _shhh_!” Jinsol shushes the dog who’s whining loudly in the cage.

 

As soon as the two had walked into the apartment complex and Milo spotted Jungeun, he started to lose it. His tail is wagging so hard that it smacks against the cage and Jinsol’s worried he might actually hurt himself.

 

“Is he usually this excited to see me?” Jungeun whispers.

 

Jinsol lets out a small laugh, “Yes, but keep in mind that he hasn’t seen you in _two weeks_.”

 

She wheels Jungeun towards the dining table, moving the clusters of notebooks and spreadsheets aside to make room for the brunette.

 

Jungeun’s eyes are focused on the dog in the corner, though.

 

“Is he a puppy?”

 

“Sort of,” Jinsol says, “we got him at a dog shelter two years ago. He’s around four years old, so I guess he’s _not_ a puppy.”

 

Jungeun is quiet for a moment as Jinsol walks to the kitchen to start making some food for her.

 

“Jinsol,” Jungeun calls out.

 

“Yeah?” Jinsol says, putting down the pot in her hands and walking back over to Jungeun, “What’s up?”

 

Jungeun points to Milo, “Can you take him out?”

 

Jinsol widens her eyes, “Seriously?”

 

“Yeah,” Jungeun hums, “I… I can tell he missed me.”

 

“Well, as long as you’re alright with it,” Jinsol shrugs, walking towards the cage. She kneels down and unlocks the cage, but keeps the gate close, “Milo, _sit_.”

 

He sits, though his tail still whacks the side of the cage loudly.

 

When Jinsol opens the gate, he walks out slowly, still whining. He barks when he sees Jungeun coming towards him with the wheelchair.

 

“Milo, _down_ ,” Jinsol says sternly.

 

He listens.

 

 _Barely_.

 

He’s sitting, but he keeps getting up but then he goes back to sitting. Clearly he’s much too jittery to keep calm.

 

“He’s a good boy, isn’t he?” Jungeun mumbles, reaching a hand out.

 

Immediately, Milo licks at her palm.

 

Jinsol smiles and nods, “Yeah, he is.”

 

Seeing that Milo won’t be breaking Jungeun’s leg further, Jinsol gets up from the ground and heads back to the kitchen to continue making dinner for them.

 

-

 

When it’s time for Jungeun to take a shower, Jinsol offers to help.

 

To Jungeun, Jinsol’s a complete stranger.

 

But she’s also a complete stranger who is very, _very_ in love with her (anybody with eyes could see that Jinsol’s in love with Jungeun), so Jungeun trusts her.

 

There’s nothing awkward or uncomfortable with the way Jinsol helps her undress. She’s careful, especially when it comes to getting her shirt off without moving her head around too much and getting her pants off without hurting her leg.

 

With the stool set in the middle of the tub, Jinsol looks between the girl sitting on the lidded toilet and the bathtub. She thinks for a moment, then:

 

“Can I lift you up?”

 

“What?”

 

Letting out a little cough, Jinsol gestures to the bathtub, “Can I, like… carry you? It’ll be easier than you trying to get into the tub without your leg—”

 

“Yeah,” Jungeun nods, “sure.”

 

“Okay,” Jinsol says, “stand on your good leg, please.”

 

Jungeun does as she’s told and unknowingly holds her breath when Jinsol gets closer. Warm hands curl around her waist and Jinsol’s surprisingly strong. She lifts Jungeun and carefully sets her down onto the stool in the tub.

 

“Let me get the stuff that you usually use,” Jinsol mumbles, more to herself, as she leans across Jungeun’s naked body to reach for the girl’s shampoo and conditioner. Jungeun watches as Jinsol sets all of the bottles in arms-reach for her. She brings a tube of toothpaste and Jungeun’s red toothbrush, too.

 

“There,” Jinsol hums, “I’m going to keep the door unlocked, okay?”

 

Jungeun nods. Jinsol smiles, “Call me when you’re done.”

 

-

 

“Jinsol, I’m done!”

 

Jinsol’s opening the bathroom door a few seconds later.

 

“Oh, wow,” Jinsol waves at all the steam in the air, “you still like your showers _burning hot_ , don’t you?”

 

Jungeun lets out a little chuckle, and it makes Jinsol’s smile widen.

 

She hands Jungeun a towel, which the girl wraps around her shoulders, and then gets rid of the plastic bag around the girl’s cast.

 

“Stand,” Jinsol mumbles, making sure to keep one hand on Jungeun’s arm to keep the girl steady, “I was just going to carry you to the bedroom so you could change there but I can go get the wheelchair if you want me to…”

 

“Carrying sounds fine by me,” Jungeun smiles, and it’s almost like she isn’t completely naked in front of this stranger. Something about Jinsol makes her feel… safe.

 

Jungeun feels Jinsol’s arms slide underneath the backs of her knees and her waist.

 

“Hold onto my neck, please,” Jinsol murmurs. Jungeun does as she’s told and a few seconds later, she feels herself being lifted bridal style by the blonde.

 

Jinsol’s careful when she’s carrying her, making sure not to bump into the doorway and turning corners slowly.

 

“You’ve done this a lot, haven’t you?” Jungeun asks, voice quiet because their faces are so close together.

 

Jinsol lets out a smile.

 

It’s a sad smile.

 

“You used to fall asleep on the couch all the time back when I took late shifts,” Jinsol explains, “I’d carry you to bed almost every night, no matter how tired I was.”

 

Jungeun stares at Jinsol’s side-profile as she says this, taking note of the way Jinsol refuses to make eye-contact with her.

 

When they get to the bedroom, Jinsol carefully places her on the edge of the bed.

 

She helps Jungeun get dressed, and then lets out a little sigh, “All done,” she smiles.

 

When she notices the water dripping from the bottom of Jungeun’s hair, she takes the towel that had been tossed aside and starts drying the girl’s hair.

 

She stops after a minute because she realizes that Jungeun could probably do this all by herself.

 

“Sorry,” she mumbles, letting go of the towel.

 

“What are you apologizing for?” Jungeun asks, tilting her head at the girl’s guilty face.

 

“It must be weird just—having someone who you don’t even know taking care of you and acting like you’re girlfriends, or whatever,” Jinsol says.

 

“But that’s what we are, isn’t it?”

 

Jinsol’s eyes widen, “Wait—what?”

 

Jungeun frowns, “Are we not girlfriends?”

 

“I—I don’t know? Are we?”

 

“You can’t answer a question with a question, Jinsol,” Jungeun smiles.

 

“Well, I didn’t want to _assume_ … you don’t even remember me,” Jinsol mumbles, frantic, “but why would you want to be girlfriends with someone you don’t even know? That doesn’t make sense, does it?”

 

The question goes unanswered, because it’s then that Milo comes walking into the bedroom, easily jumping up onto the bed and licking at Jungeun’s face.

 

Jungeun lightly pushes the dog away with her right hand, laughing as she does so.

 

Jinsol uses that as her escape.

 

“I’m going to go take a shower myself,” she says, “make sure not to get up.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Jungeun mock-salutes.

 

Jinsol smiles the brightest that Jungeun’s seen her smile since she’s woken up.

 

-

 

“I had a diary?” Jungeun asks when she hears Jinsol’s feet approach the bedroom.

 

“Yeah,” Jinsol walks into the room, drying her hair with a towel. She spots Jungeun with the black journal she’d always write in before bed, “you never let me read it.”

 

Jungeun snorts, “I can see why.”

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jinsol calls out as she heads to the closet, tossing her dirty clothes into the laundry basket there.

 

“I poured my _heart_ out to you in here,” Jungeun says, “it’s embarrassing.”

 

“You’d think six years of dating would make you more comfortable about that stuff with me,” Jinsol laughs.

 

“Stop, oh my _God_ , I don’t think I’ve ever been this sappy with someone… not even Jiwoo,” Jungeun says, her ears starting to burn.

 

“Yeah, well, you _were_ in love with me,” Jinsol grins, but the light in her eyes dims a second later upon realization that she’d just used past-tense. Jungeun’s not in love with her anymore.

 

Jungeun feels the uneasiness grow in her stomach at the silence.

 

Jinsol bites down on her lower lip, and then continues to dry her hair, “So, uh… I was planning on taking the couch tonight.”

 

“What? No you’re not,” Jungeun replies, closing the journal, “you _just_ carried me while I was naked. I’m pretty sure we can share a bed together.”

 

“No, it’s not that—I… I cuddle when I sleep, and I don’t want to accidentally bump your broken leg,” Jinsol admits shyly.

 

Jungeun thinks that the way she looks down at the ground and fiddles with the towel in between her fingers is adorable.

 

She smiles, “Jinsol.”

 

“Yes?”

 

“You can sleep in the bed with me.”

 

“...” Jinsol’s smile grows wider, “Okay.”

 

-

 

When Jinsol’s phone buzzes, Jungeun reaches over to turn the ringer off because the blonde girl is already asleep.

 

Clearly Jinsol’s been having a hard time sleeping recently, and Jungeun doesn’t want the phone to wake her up. However, when Jungeun sees the contact name ‘Jiwoo’, her eyes automatically flicker down to the text preview.

 

**[Jiwoo]: hey soul, how is she? and how are you? :( if you want me to go with you to return the engagement ring then…**

 

The rest of the text message is cut off, but it’s enough to make Jungeun’s stomach drop.

 

…

 

Engagement ring?

 

…

 

 _Damn_.

 

—

 

A few days pass and Jinsol’s not brought up anything about an engagement ring, but it’s all Jungeun can think about.

 

(Jinsol’s not gone out for anything other than work. She’s been home with Jungeun.

 

Did she keep the ring?)

 

Whenever she finds herself staring at Jinsol’s concentrated face as the girl does some work on her laptop, she can’t help but feel guilty that she can’t remember the years she’s spent with Jinsol.

 

Six years is a _long time_ to be with someone, _especially_ to Jungeun, who’s always thought she’d get bored of being in a long-term relationship. But Jungeun has to remember that she’s in her mid-twenties now, _not_ her late-teens.

 

She’s spent _six_ years with this woman sat on the couch next to her.

 

“Jinsol,” she calls out quietly.

 

Jinsol looks up from her laptop immediately, always attentive to the younger girl, “Yes?”

 

Jungeun bites her lip nervously. The blonde girl turns her body to face Jungeun, sensing the girl’s anxiousness, “What’s up, Jungie?”

 

 _Jungie_.

 

It’s familiar. It’s _so_ familiar.

 

But Jungeun just can’t remember.

 

She wants to remember, though.

 

Jungeun moves her body forward, practically launching herself into Jinsol’s lap, hugging the girl tightly.

 

Jinsol gasps, though her arms wrap around Jungeun’s waist, “What’s this for?”

 

Her hand traces circles on Jungeun’s lower back.

 

Jungeun, face buried in Jinsol’s shoulder, turns so her nose grazes the side of Jinsol’s neck.

 

“I want to fall in love with you again,” she whispers, listening to the hitch in Jinsol’s breath.

 

…

 

And then, Jinsol lets out a small giggle.

 

“Okay,” she says.

 

Jungeun holds onto her tighter.

 

Jinsol presses a light kiss to Jungeun’s shoulder.

 

“I can make that happen.”

**Author's Note:**

> twitter: @sxftmelody  
> curiouscat: @sxftmelody
> 
>  
> 
> was initially gonna make this a longer one-shot where jungeun ends up falling in love with haseul, a new co-worker at her job, but i didn't want to put jinsol through Too much pain.


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